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Overview of topics

Tips for a successful affair

Always stay calm

Don’t hang your head if you’ve been rejected or if a person you sent a contact request to just doesn’t answer. This can happen from time to time and it’s nothing bad at all. Try to contact another couple of potential affair partners. Just start flirting whenever you have the opportunity and don’t put yourself under any pressure; you’ll only look insecure to your counterpart if you do. Whoever appears self confident and optimistic will always appeal more to the opposite sex. Be calm and in a relaxed frame of mind when you approach the topic of an affair and you will see that you will be successful.

Open for something new

Too short, too blond, too chubby . . . don’t immediately delete all the profiles that don’t fit your optical ideal at first glance. The more open you are regarding appearance, the more potential contacts you will receive. And the probability that you will make a lot of new experiences increases at the same time. You’ll be expanding your horizons not only in a sexual but also in an interpersonal sense. Don’t be too strict about insisting only on your optical ideal and open yourself up to all the people you encounter.

Honesty and transparency

An affair is not about true love, promises of faithfulness and a serious bond. You should always bear this in mind; otherwise you run the risk of being disappointed. An example of a situation which often occurs: she says “I don’t want a relationship!” but he understands “I don’t want a relationship yet!” and is astonished when his attempts to emotionally get closer to her fail miserably.

This is why it’s important that both partners clearly define exactly what they want and don’t want before the first meeting. If after a longer period of contact one of the affair partners develops feelings that the other doesn’t, then contact should be politely but decisively ended. The longer a one-sided affair drags on, the more heartache the one involved person has to endure.

Always be discrete

One topic that’s absolutely off-limits when you meet your potential affair partner is how many affairs they’ve already had. What’s more, you should always avoid mentioning personal things you experienced in other affairs at all costs. If you don’t, this not only shows your counterpart that you have no discretion at all but also that you like to brag about your sexual experiences in front of others. As a plausible conclusion, your counterpart will immediately end the evening and terminate contact to you for good. You should therefore handle all of your potential affair contacts discreetly and with respect at all times; otherwise sooner or later you are going to suffer as a result.

No emotional bond

Be careful that you don’t fall into a sex trap. A fulfilling sexual adventure can unexpectedly release a kind of hormone cocktail that can generate a strong desire for attachment or feelings of infatuation. As soon as you realize that an affair means more to you than just good sex, you have to be careful. An emotional bond can grow quickly out of a physical connection. And out of an emotional bond, a romantic drama can emerge in the twinkling of an eye. If after a short amount of time you determine that casual sex without feelings is not possible for you, then you should probably restrict yourself to a sexless adventure.

No entry: private life

If you don’t want to risk being caught by your real spouse then you shouldn’t invite your affair partner to your home. Your bed at home should be a place for genuine togetherness with your steady partner. Rituals such as a DVD movie night in sweats or cooking together are much too personal for an affair partner. As long as you don’t want to cultivate a serious love relationship with someone, you shouldn’t allow them any access to your private life . . . unless, that is, you are attracted to the thrill of having an affair in your own bed.

Always be respectful

At your first meeting with your potential affair partner, anything can happen. Either you’ll find each other congenial and an affair will develop or you’ll recognize right away that you don’t find each other physically attractive and break off contact. Every once in a while it can even happen that you experience love at first sight. No matter what happens for whatever reason, speak with your counterpart openly and honestly about it. Remain polite, fair and respectful in any and every situation. If during the affair one of you develops feelings for the other then tactfulness and discretion are especially required.

Follow your gut instincts

Always listen to your inner voice if something about your affair partner should seem strange. Did he or she for example say something that made you suspicious or does the person seem phony or artificial? Then just act instinctively and break off contact to this person. Your gut instinct can also work in the opposite direction and indicate to you that your counterpart is exactly the right person with whom you could imagine having uninhibited sex. Whatever happens, do pay attention to your intuition as experience shows that you’re usually on the right track.